Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize