love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
it glows. i had to have it.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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