My brain says no but my pants say off.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
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