you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
