yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
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