So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Randomize
