OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
