they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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