It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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