I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Randomize
