And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Wtf am i supposed to tell my kids when they ask about my first time? "Mommy got drunk off her ass and fucked a total stranger in another stranger's bedroom, then got abandoned by the selfish prick and walk of shamed to the nearest gas station to call a cab, but ended up passed out in a park in a pool of her own puke."
At least mommy was smart enough to use protection and hack into the asshole's facebook account.
Well of course. Mommy may be a slutty drunk but she ain't no idiot.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
