It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
