Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
accomplished twins. life is a go
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
