I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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