now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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