she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
