Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Randomize
