K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
FUCK WHALES
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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