Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
