Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Drunk is a universal language darling
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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