Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
It's never too late to be topless.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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