I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Randomize
