Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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