Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
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