I think scott just propositioned me for sex
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
