...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
