We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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