You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
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