Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
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