So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize