my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
its liver damage thursday
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