so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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