I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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