dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
