pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
is wine microwaveable?
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
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