my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize