your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize