Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
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