i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
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