I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
