Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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