People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
