I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Randomize
