his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
