The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Come back. Shots need mouths.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Randomize
