We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
I want to fling myself into the sun
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