Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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