if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
The struggles of a small town man whore
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
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