her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
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