u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
